12.08.05

Why should you hate weblogs?

Posted in Hobomaster at 6:09 pm by Verifex

I used to think weblogs sucked, until I realized that my thinking that they suck wouldn’t make them go away.  So I did what any other moron does.  I got a weblog!  Now I can complain about weblogs existing on weblogs themselves.  I think it is quite important and amazing and you should keep reading about it, because I might stop talking about it soon and then you’ll miss out on that won’t you.  ahhhhhhhh..  that was good.

Here is another link to a guy who hate weblogs too.  If you go there, tell him that he really should start commenting in some online weblogs about how much they suck, and make sure to link to his site as often as possible.  I think if you have 20,000 blogs linking to some stupid guys site that talks about how much blogs suck, that indeed will make blogs suck.  Atleast by bloggers rules standards.  Because whatever is at the top of google counts as the rule I think.  Actually who cares, do what you want.  Also leave a couple dimes on the ground outside your house.

This is where we learn hobo rules and regulations.

Posted in Hobomaster at 5:28 pm by Verifex

The hobo college, thats right, it went out of business, apparently 3 decades of hobos learned all they needed to know from this honored place.  It is rather sad to hear that it went away though, I guess there is just no money in hobos.  Damn the man!

In my quest to provide you with the complete unadulterated hobo, I come across many a hobo website.  Today I found the hobo dictionary. (Also here)  This is what being a hobo is all about, finding new things, adding them to your knowledge and becoming a better person.  Also eating and sleeping in other peoples places.


Not Hobo Related

If I had a fifth of a penny for every bit of content I find duplicated ad nauseum online, I would have so much money, that I alone would cause the entire monetary system to collapse.  It really is too bad that you can’t see when and where that Britney Spears mp3 was first ripped from the CD.  Wouldn’t it be fascinating to see how many times it was played, copied, and subsequently deleted?  I think the only things that gather information that fervently are trojans though.  (not the prophylactic)

 


Hobo Related

Can I gain all the knowledge of hobos, and reproduce it here?  Possibly, but I might then violate some international hobo law.  (special hobo courts are ruthless)  While looking for hobos, I found this hobo.  As much as I would like to believe ‘Ben’, if-that-is-his-real-name, somehow I doubt his hoboness.  Most hobos do not write so articulately that they actually make sense.

 

12.07.05

Spot the Hobo!

Posted in Hobomaster at 4:17 pm by Verifex

The web is awash with accessories for the modern hobo.  There are hobo bags, hobo symbols, hobo food and of course, hobo clothing.

However, there are a number of things on line that do not portray the hobo lifestyle as accurately as they could.  As a service to you, I am going to point out these inconsistencies to you now.

  • Hobo Camera – Hobos would never use such a large unwieldy camera, as it would not fit in a easily resealable hobo pack on a stick.  Plus, a hobo only has room for 1 or 2 photos in his wallet.
  • Hobo Porn Film Name Generator – While hobos may indeed work in pornography occasionally to make a buck, no self-respecting hobo would leverage their hoboness to make such unspeakable acts.  Plus hobos don’t have time to make up fancy names.
  • Hobowars – First of all, there is no hobo army, it is a myth, and there definitely is no hobo general or commander.  Hobos have better things to do, like live life and survive, then plan death and destruction.
  • HoBO Magazine – I don’t know how many times I need to reiterate this, but the hobo lifestyle is not appropriate to be represented in a modern, glossy, pretentious magazine.  Besides, hobos don’t need to read magazines to know what they like.  They just do.
  • International Hobo (not the bags) – Thats right, this company is trying to delude you into thinking there is some kind of international hobo cartel, and that they spend all day toiling away on a book on how to develop video games.  Well here is news for you, hobos aren’t into that kind of thing.
  • The Billion Dollar Hobo – The inherent paradox of this movie just goes against everything hobo-esque.

Well that is it for now, I’ll probably add more as I find them, but remember, when they say hobo, they mean business.  Defhobo Business.

12.06.05

Where is our commision?

Posted in Hobomaster at 12:00 pm by Verifex

When using the internet, I tend to look for other hobo related services and products so that I can improve our own services.  Sometimes I find good ideas, other times I find outright lies!  Today I found lies!  For instance, what is this?  Can you believe that?  They copyrighted the word hobo, you can’t copyright an entire class of people like that without giving them some kind of kick backs or commission or something.  And even this?  Hoboware?  Why are the hobos of the world being used for crazy gadgets and software and not being given a good meal and a place to stay?  Have a heart people!  The gaul of this company to reduce an entire class of people down to a simple software program and then, just as simply, sell it for millions.  How dare them!

Misrepresentation!

Posted in Hobomaster at 11:21 am by Verifex

The cops over in spanaway are posing as hobos, and holding up signs saying "Happy Holidays, Buckle Up".  I am no sure how to treat this, on one hand, hobos are being misrepresented and being ridiculed by the authorities.  And on the other hand, the more people know about hobos being cops, the more respect people might give  to hobos, thinking that they might be cops.  So I’m confused.  I think the cops should hire us real hobos to do the job though, that copper was taking up a real nice place that many a hobo could’ve been at, making money, lots of money.

Found here while roaming the streets.